Last Updated on Wednesday, 05 August 2015 16:06
By Kevin Hartzell
Let’s Play Hockey Columnist
I have been lucky this summer to spend more time with more friends and family. It has been both the best of times, and unfortunately, also the worst of times, tolerable only because of the bonds shared by family and friends. Through it all, I have been afforded a variety of prisms to look through and time to reflect on what I have been seeing.
I have been around younger people this summer more than in the past. By “younger” I am talking about teens and our younger adults. I have been around young adults with the hockey teams I have been helping. I also have been around the many young adults that make up our family and friends. It is obvious in my observations of our young adults that times are a-changin’.
I have spent time reflecting on what I am seeing, but these observations and are just that, observations. I am trying to understand better what I am seeing, but find I am reaching few clear conclusions. My two observations today to share with you include the role of technology and the role of parenting on our kids and society in today’s world. Parents, of course, have always played an important role and technology has taken on an ever-increasing role. I have been thinking much about both.
The first subject is the cell phone. It is a great tool for sure. We all know what the cell phone can do and be. It is first and foremost a person-to-person communicator, but it is also a compass, a weather station, a recorder of history, a calculator, an alarm clock, an encyclopedia, a shopping mall and more, all in one device.
The cell phone is an amazing paradox in itself because while it connects us to much, it is also distracts and disconnects us from what might be most important – the present. There is nothing more important than living in the present. Instead of connecting us to the activity and people we are sharing the activity with, we often, via the cell phone, go off to other places and other missions and miss the very opportunity to fully share in the experience life puts right in front of us.
I have watched this younger generation barely able to hold a conversation because the next phone alert is disrupting their presence with a ping alert. Or a task is started and then forgotten temporarily or completely as the next task has been called-in via the phone. I watch as what should be a shared experience become an individual experience in a far-away place. It is no wonder why some of our young people’s attention span is what it is.
Then there is this new age of parenting, of which I have been a part of. We are friends, organizers and task completers to those cell phone-distracted kids. It wasn’t long ago, as a matter of fact, my generation was one of the last, where very good parents did not organize, or try to entertain their kids. There was one TV in the household and it was controlled by a parent. We kids were told to “get outside” and if nothing else, to stay out of trouble.
My parents were great, but they went about their business while we kids kind of raised each other on the streets and play-grounds. Make no mistake, our parents and our churches played an important role in establishing and reinforcing our moral direction, but it was a different time to be sure. And you know what, we kids learned a lot from each other.
Don’t get me wrong, there are tons of great kids today. But I do see signs in many of distraction which at times leads to a lack of initiative and/or leadership. Kids heads are filled with so many voices and noises that sometimes they are not taking time to really think about where or why these noises are coming at them.
And we parents … we are so very involved. I think we would all agree that being an involved parent is a good thing. But how much to be involved is the question! We organize practices, travel and games. Hockey is not vaccinated from these issues.
Then there is Facebook and an ever-more “look at me” generation. I asked my daughter for permission to share a little personal story. She agrees it is funny, so here goes: My daughter Whitney and I were taking a visiting family from Norway to see St. Paul and we were including the Como Zoo. Before we left, my lovely daughter was getting herself all made up to look good. I asked my daughter why on this hot, steamy day with a zoo in our future she would be getting all prettied-up. “Don’t want to look crappy on Facebook” was her reply. I get it, but never thought about it before that moment.
I am far from convinced that this “progress” we are making as a society is more good than not. And that said, I believe the world is getting increasingly harder. There is a world economy that will demand more from our young people. Rewards in the work place will be and are proving to be, harder to gather. More effort will be required. More education will be required. And there are world stresses that will not resolve themselves easily. Our young people are entering an ever-changing and tougher world.
How will they do? Are we giving them the best chance to be successful? I don’t know but I do find this new world ever interesting, and those of us who are parents, teachers, coaches and even writers, have as important of a role as ever.
And lastly, how does this play into the mental and spiritual growth of our young hockey participants? Do we ask them to travel to games without cell phones and simply to enjoy the hockey experiences with their friends, coaches and teammates? Do we for sure keep cell phones out of the locker room? Do we allow our young players to take at least some responsibility and ownership for organization and team performance? Do we and can we convince them that the hockey experience is a team thing and not an “I” thing for their place in the social media world? Lots of questions, not many answers.
Kevin Hartzell was most recently the head coach of Lillehammer in Norway’s GET-Ligaen. A St. Paul native and forward for the University of Minnesota from 1978-82, Hartzell coached in the USHL from 1983-89 with the St. Paul Vulcans and from 2005-12 with the Sioux Falls Stampede. His columns have appeared in Let’s Play Hockey since the late 1980s. His new book “Leading From the Ice” is now available at amazon.com.
